Many of my journal entries over the past year or two have ended with me writing the words; one thing at a time.
Getting started can be so, so hard. The internal resistance to putting forth external effort and action if measurable, would go off the charts and break the instruments.
When one is able to at least temporarily squeeze through or push past perfectionism and create something, regardless of quality, the inner pressure release and sense of relief would be the equivalent of sky diving, while holding and anvil.
One thing at a time
One action at a time
One choice at a time
What is quality? What is good and bad? The gatekeepers have been out to lunch for decades at this point. Just do it.
Spotlight effect often holds people back. I know it held me back. With a little (or a lot) of Imposter Syndrome mixed in.
One thing I realized, after a very, very long time of thinking about it, journaling about it, meditating about it, drinking about it…was that if I really did think what I wanted to create was so bad then I wouldn’t be negatively judging other’s so frequently and/or so harshly.
But that’s not what we’re doing when we’re negatively judging other acts of creation. We’re projecting self hatred. I know I was. It got to the point where I was getting into verbal conflicts with people I hardly knew at bars over…nothing. I think back to what started those verbal tiffs and after I cringe, I slap myself in the forehead and stay there because they never actually said or did anything. I was just projecting my self hatred onto others because I wasn’t doing what I wanted to do which was creating.
A creator that doesn’t create, otherwise known as a writer or artist sans the word professional prefixed.
Just publishing blogs, articles, essays, and thoughts has changed my mental and emotional state immeasurably. Is my content good? Is it important? Is it impactful? Well all metrics of external success would say no, then to pat me on my head and say at least you tried.
But it’s good for me. It’s working for me. It’s helping me. And you can’t help others unless you help yourself first. You can’t feed others from an empty bowl. You can’t put on someone else’s oxygen mask if you are suffocating to death yourself.
One thing at a time
One action at a time
One choice at a time
Anarchy Journal Constitutional 