Archive for the ‘Anarchy Journal Constitutional’ Category

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By @anarchyroll

Life can be funny, and by funny, I mean frustrating as fucking hell why the fuck is this bullshit happening?!!!!

That was basically how every fan of Daniel Bryan/Brian Danielson felt when he retired earlier this month. A very low low. Premature retirement for one of the greatest and most popular of all time can’t be spun as positive.

The low of Bryan’s retirement completely overshadowed the ecstasy high that alternative wrestling fans had been feeling in the days following the long anticipated and even longer overdue debut of AJ Styles. Styles’ debut in the Royal Rumble match and subsequent programs with The Miz and Chris Jericho have been great. Only fantasy booking nitpickers could find flaws in how Styles has been showcased thus far.

AJ Styles is the biggest name and greatest star created outside of WWE since the end of the Monday Night War. He is one of only two legitimate superstars created by TNA Wrestling (Bobby Roode the other). His arrival and white glove treatment is validation of both him and his fan base.

His arrival also signifies the final deathnail in the coffin of the previous paradigm of WWE Superstar requirements. Young, tall, bodybuilder, without any accent, or experience outside of the WWE system. AJ Styles is an old (by pro wrestling standards), short, gymnast, southerner who is the face of alternative professional wrestling since 2002. The signings of Fergal Devitt, Kevin Steen, El Generico, and Samoa Joe were all fine and good, but AJ Styles was more successful in the non WWE world than all of them put together. AJ Styles is the embodiment in every way of the type of wrestler that WWE does not sign and showcase on their main roster.

But none of that matters right now does it? Not now, not for another month or two. Why? Because Daniel Bryan had to retire due to injury.

Daniel Bryan was the next John Cena, Steve Austin, Bret Hart, Hulk Hogan, Bob Backlund, Bruno Sammartino, Buddy Rodgers. Daniel Bryan was THE guy. The new face of WWE. The leader of the next generation. The main event player for the next five to ten years. The fans couldn’t have been happier since they went to war with Vince McMahon over the issue and won.

And now he’s gone. Cut down in his prime, right as his prime got started. How many televised matches did Daniel Bryan have after Wrestlemania 30?

Life isn’t fair, Daniel Bryan being forced to retire is not fair. AJ Styles’ ten year overdue WWE debut being lost in the shuffle of an entire generation of fans’ grieving the loss of their hero isn’t fair.

Daniel Bryan was so great, that if he never debuted in WWE, he would be the other face of alternative pro wrestling next to AJ Styles. Brian Danielson is still to this day the greatest star Ring of Honor has ever produced. He was an American indy scene main eventer for half a decade and international pro wrestling title holder years before ever debuting on the first season of the NXT on SyFy tournament.

AJ Styles is still the face of TNA Wrestling even though he hasn’t been there for two years. That company was built on his shoulders. He left as their World Champion and went on to become the most successful American in Japanese pro wrestling history with only maybe Big Van Vader in his league. He also main evented the last ROH pay per view of 2015, a company he first debuted for at their third show ever in 2002.

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Less than a month before debuting at the Royal Rumble, Styles co main evented a show in the Tokyo Dome against the second most popular and profitable of the last decade in Japanese wrestling (Shinsuke Nakamura).

The last memory of Daniel Bryan’s in ring career will be standing on top of a ladder, as WWE Intercontinental Champion, leading 70,000 people in a YES chant. Not a bad way to go out but not what anyone wanted, expected, or had a nightmare about.

What we can hope for is that AJ Styles will be slid into Daniel Bryan’s main event spot like Rey Mysterio slid into Eddie Guerrero’s spot in 2006. More importantly, hopefully Bryan’s rise and quick fall will serve as an impetus for WWE to strike while the iron is hot for wrestlers who get over in the future.

Daniel Bryan should have been the guy The Rock feuded with, not John Cena. Cena was over and overly exposed three years before his feud with Rock. Bryan had emerged as the most loved babyface in the company coming out of WrestleMania 28. Cena could have easily been slotted to continue his feud with Punk going into 29. A feud which btw, never had a blowoff.

Hopefully WWE will accept rather than resist when a super junior heavyweight gets over more than Vince McMahon’s chosen super heavyweight superman.

AJ Styles is already more over as a babyface than Roman Reigns. His babyface reactions in the arena are second to no full time wrestler on the active WWE roster with the possible exception of Dean Ambrose. But Styles is already selling more merchandise than Ambrose.

Will WWE do the right thing and listen to their fans? They are already paying AJ Styles like he’s a main eventer. They have to be considering what Styles was being offered via duel contracts with ROH and NJPW. So lets see where Styles is slotted both at WrestleMania and after it.

What would a healthy Daniel Bryan be doing at WrestleMania and Summerslam this year? We know what that answer should be. And that should be what AJ Styles is doing. I’m excited to find out. But not as excited as I am sad that the American Dragon will fly no more.

One legend exits, another arrives, and the machine rolls on.

 

 

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By @anarchyroll

If you can read this, then you’ve seen Deadpool already. The real question is, have you read reviews of the film in the internet blogsphere?!

Most people dont give a shit about movie reviews from credible sources, let alone from people on WordPress. But hey, the trailer is embedded below this half paragraph, and you know you want to see it again for the first time since you watched it five times in a row two weeks ago.

What can I say about this movie that the three shit stains who sat behind me in the theater didnt say every god damn time there was a quiet scene?! I’m sorry they CGI shadowed his dick in that naked fight scene Janet, but could you please shut the fuck up and stop crumpling your bag of popcorn every ten fucking seconds?!!

Where was I? Oh yeah, the movie review. Here we go; Maxim effort…

Synopsis; if you don’t have a stick, rod, gerbel, or crucifix up your ass you’re going to love it. Seeing this movie was easily the hardest I laughed since my mom died two months ago. Escapism never felt so sweet or so vulgar.

If you haven’t seen it, and like comic books, comic book movies, action movies, and/or dirty dark humor than this movie is for you.

If it were up to me, all comic book movies would be hard Rs. Why? Because fuck little kids that’s why! Aaannnnnnd that definitely didn’t come out right. But you know what I mean. I’m clearly making an amateur attempt to apply Deadpool’s style of humor and forth wall breaking to this movie review blog.

If I keep this up I’ll be able to afford that premium theme in no time. Then I’ll start raking in that internet cash. Yeah…

What am I writing again? That’s right a movie review. Because their definitely isn’t enough opinion based content about comic book movie quality on the internet.

It was great, not good, great and the sequel with Cable can’t come out soon enough.

Now, to the imortant question, where’s the chimichanga I ordered on GrubHub?!!

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by @anarchyroll

Global Disaster

There is something about those two words paired with each other that grabs one’s attention and holds it like a vice. When the two words are placed next to each other by a scientist studying ten years worth of data from NASA, the vice is more like the jaws of life.

When that decade long study involves an additional 35 years of weather data? Eek. BUT, this is not another global warming warning. This is about the next wave of haves and have nots. Economic inequality? That is so 20th century.

A world with such water scarcity that wars are fought for it? Seems like science fiction dystopian bullshit. Except if you live in California during the last half decade, or the country of Ethiopia or the continent of Australia.

The study of Famiglietti et al, directly talks about the rich-get-richer-mechanism and emerging classes of haves and have nots in regards to water access. That is the language of the scientist.

That prospect wouldn’t be worrisome if economic poverty wasn’t a thing or wasn’t increasing or wasn’t pervasive or wasn’t silently condoned by the actions of the first world.

The rich get richer and the poor get poorer paradigm applied to water access will be the literal manifestation of trickle down economics. People will literally be dependent on the miniscule droplets of the source of life to survive while the haves bathe their terminally ill pets in triple filtered, reverse osmosis purified agua.

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Global Disaster

Groundwater depletion coupled with rising sea levels and no meaningful action being done about either while hoping human beings will share resources voluntarily after those resources have been consolidated involuntarily.

Sounds like a recipe for disaster…..Sounds like another day, in Frackishima.

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by @anarchyroll

There is something about the genuine article that attracts and magnetizes people.

Deep down inside, we know when we are dealing with a human being who is the real thing, and one who is an imitation/impostor. Granted, that line of thinking exists in the same world as the concept that it’s a shame to let a sucker keep their money. But people tend to know the truth in the gut if they are not having their senses bombarded with fear based propaganda.

Ten, twenty, thirty years ago what would the general perception be of a socialist running for President of the United States? How would the public react? What would the polls say?

Twenty, thirty, forty years of the masses being nickeled and dimed as the rich get richer and the poor get poorer piled on top of $475 BILLION of taxpayer money as a reward to Wall Street for causing the second coming of the Great Depression…..and all of a sudden a socialist in the White House is less much less far out or radical than any Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle catch phrase.

The most successful Independent politician in United States history was Bernie Sanders ten years ago. A self identified Democratic Socialist, Sanders spent 16 years as a United States Congressman before being elected as a US Senator. People of a certain age would love to believe Ross Perot’s run in the 1992 election is the shining example of independent candidates making a splash, but Sanders has already erased all of Perot’s accomplishments outside of Dana Carvey’s SNL impression skits.

Sanders is the real thing, the genuine article. A very white male who was arrested during a 1960s civil rights protest. A socialist who says very loudly, very often that he is going to raise taxes. A leftist who makes not attempt to move to the middle regardless of how politically prudent it is to do so. A man who speaks openly of the NEED for revolution on the reg.

I personally know three people who hate Bernie Sanders and respect him at the same time. They all hate him because they are well off and know he’ll raise their taxes, they respect him because he’s authentic. Well guess what folks?

In the year 2016, in the United States of America, there are WAYYYYYY more legal voters who respect Bernie Sanders for being authentic than rich people who hate him because they know he’s going to raise their taxes.

That is why Bernie Sanders is a legit general election threat, not just a primary darling. That is why Bernie Sanders has NOT gone mainstream. Mainstream has gone Bernie Sanders.

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by @anarchyroll

Tackling environmental causes is as important as it is thankless.

There is nothing more important to the survival of the human race, than insuring that we have clean air, drinkable water, harvestable land as well as habitable temperatures and sea levels. Other issues are as important on micro/local levels. Some issues are artificially inflated to seem as important. The only other topic that carries the gravitas of capability of wiping out the human race is warfare…..and asteroids from outer space. But as long as Bruce Willis and Ben Affleck are alive, we’re safe.

Warfare and environmental issues parallel each other. Both can have truly global impacts. Both issues have resulted in global changes over the past century. Both issues are so complex it’s hard to wrap one’s head around them. Both issues are so important they are boring. Both issues change and evolve in a way inconvenient for twenty four hour news cycles. Both issues see new sub issues come up immediately after victories making celebrations both limited and moot.

WWI to WWII to Vietnam to Gulf War One to Gulf War Too to Al Qaeda to ISIS. Global warming to drought to famine to flooding to super storms. But it’s not just the big macro stuff. It is also the smaller micro topics. Terrorist attacks and poisoned drinking water reservoirs. Hostage crises to methane leaks.

People who care about the environment and know about climate change should still be rejoicing over the historic Paris Climate Deal that was signed in mid December. 200 countries signing an agreement with legal force to reach zero carbon emissions in the second half of this century is certainly worth a celebration. 2015 closed with the biggest victory to date in regard to the biggest macro environmental issue.

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In the United States, 2016 has begun with a two micro environmental issues making the Paris Agreement feel a world away. The California Methane Leak and the Flint Water Crisis have grabbed attention and headlines usually reserved for sports and celebrity gossip. If the body count goes up, maybe either issue can be talked about as much as the weather.

EMERGENCY!!!

A State of Emergency has been declared in California over the three month and counting leak of underground methane reservoirs into the air. 2,000 people have been evacuated from their homes with many more seeking relocation assistance in Southern California. A bonafied environmental disaster has struck the Porter Ranch area.

EMERGENCY!!!

A presidential emergency declaration has been given to Flint, Michigan by Barack Obama. $80 million in resources will be given to city that has had its water supply poisoned via bureaucratic cost cutting. 100,000 people including schools full of children have been exposed to toxic drinking water for years.

Wide reaching and far stretching damage at a biblical scale. That is why environmental issues are the most worthy of the attention and resources of the masses and those in power. 200 countries came together in Paris knowing this. That economic bickering and small scale terror attacks mean nothing in the face of environmental crises capable of wiping out the entire human race.

Flint and Porter Ranch merely scratch the surface of the severity of negative environmental issue impacts. Poisoned air, poisoned water, and a poisoned atmosphere that will effect global warming. Each issue individually can lead to death instantly and severe pain, discomfort, and displacement. The negative consequences of the issues will be on a monumental scale at an unceasing length.

Environmental issues are real issues. Nothing soft news about them, they are very hard news second to none. Scientists giving speeches or scientific reports/studies being released don’t get the play or attention that war stories get. If it bleeds it leads in the broadcast news world. It is not wrong to care and focus on the casualties of war. But please remember that just because the destruction is immediate and sensational, doesn’t mean it is the most austere.

A gun can kill many. A bomb many more. But a poisoned water supply? Unbreathable air due to toxic gas? If an army or terrorist group poisoned the water supply or the air supply of two American cities, what would the reaction be? Does incompetence of a corporation or governing body make the consequences less grave?

The impact of environmental issues are immune to perception and/or plausibility. You can choose to not believe or not care about the methane leak in Southern California. I can choose to tell my social circle the effects on global warming of the methane leak won’t be huge and felt for decades to come. But the gigantic amount of methane leaking into the air, like the lead in the Flint water supply is immune from peoples’ perceptions and beliefs.

The same is true for battles and war. The people of Paris probably believed they were safe from ISIS. America perceived the constant conflict in the Middle East wouldn’t have any effect on the homeland before 2001. Perception and belief just don’t mean anything when it comes to the facts and events that are happening. It is how we react to them and what we do going forward to minimize damage and maximize the effect of the lesson(s) learned from the events.

The methane leak is happening, the water crisis is happening, global warming is happening. These are hard facts immune from political beliefs and personal perception. What are we going to do to minimize their damage? How are we going to maximize the effects of the lessons learned from these events going forward? The answers to these questions don’t just effect a community, a country, or a continent.

They literally effect the entire human race and the entire planet we inhabit. That is why environmental issues are the most worthy of the attention and resources of the masses and those in power. The answers to these questions will be difficult, inconvenient, expensive, and require massive sacrifice. Which is why ;

Tackling environmental causes is as important as it is thankless.