Anything that lasts forever, or even a long time, loses itās appeal, becomes boring, gets taken advantage of, etc.
All experiences that we deem good or positive are that way because they donāt last. Same with the sting of the perceived negative.
Thereās that yin-yang again.
The hot burning flame versus the slow burning coal.
Happiness versus contentment.
Be aware of it, experience it, then let it go. For better and for worse.
Trying to make things permanent creates problems.
Suffering arises because of attachment to desires as a wise man once said.
I had one of the most productive stretches of time in recent years. Woke up sick the next day. Thereās that yin-yang again.
Then had a fun weekend with a friend is like a brother. But he had to go home. We werenāt sad at the end. We were grateful for the time well spent together and were both excited for what comes next for us individuality, respectively.
Letting go. Easier said than done. Like everything else, ever. But a little easier with practice. Just like everything else, everā¦
Getting started is the hardest part. Momentum can sustain itself.
There is a reason that beginning is so hard in our minds. Inertia. We need the extra effort to get started. A great external example is a space ship. The rocket blast to begin the launch and get the ship into space.
I can remember countless times, the internal feeling of some invisible, probably imaginary force pushing against my body. Making me feel mentally, emotionally, and physically uncomfortable. How am I supposed to start something new when I donāt feel good?
That is a natural thought. That is a normal reaction. I doubt Iām the only human in the history of the world to experience a fantom, physical form of resistance.
Steven Pressfield, one of my favorite authors, has built a wonderful career on his wisdom towards the concept of resistance. His book, The Art of War is the book Iāve gifted the most alongside The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday.
Resistance is the rule. Consistent effort is the exception. If that wasnāt true, we would be living in an unrecognizable utopia, probably resembling the world in Star Trek.
Iāve been practicing yoga on and off for fifteen years. I have to say on an off because I canāt in all honesty say Iāve been practicing consistently for that long. I can probably say Iāve been practicing yoga consistently for two years, maybe three. The first time I did yoga in 2008-2009, I felt great. I loved it. I knew then I wanted to make it a regular part of my life.
Yet, I still to literally this very day, five hours ago when I did yoga, I procrastinated starting it for like an hour at least. Even though it makes me feel physically good whenever I do it. Even though itās good for my physical and mental health. Yet the resistance to starting, is both strong, and dug in like a tick.
But every time when I actually start doing yoga, every time, before Iām done with my first down dog pose, I feel good, am glad I started, and finish the entire routine I set out to do whether Iām winging it or using a guide on YouTube.
Itās like that for everything. Maybe not everything feels good when we start. But when we start, and are actually doing the thing, taking action, putting forth the effort, itās easier to keep going. Itās definitely easier to keep going than our resistance and procrastination would lead us to believe in our inner monologue.
Nature trail walks/hikes have been a life saver for me.
During the Covid lockdowns in America, I was blessed to live five minutes by car from a nature trail. I went there early and often during those dark days.
Sometimes I go on walks with my earbuds in, sometimes not. Sometimes I stay for hours, sometimes just an abbreviated loop that amounts to the traditional coffee break. But every time I go, I feel at least a little better than I did before being in nature.
I canāt recommend it enough. I live in the midwestern area of the United States. It is currently too cold and too snowy to really even go outside for anything beyond survival essentials.
During these times I find myself watching nature documentaries. Or watching HD nature scenery with ambient music in the background on YouTube. Certainly not the same as the real thing, but thereās a calling to seeing nature that soothes my soul.
When I get off the main trail and am genuinely surrounded by trees, bushes, flowers, plants, grass, weeds, dirt, birds and bugsā¦I feelā¦at homeā¦I feelā¦at peace.
Because humans are apart of nature. Just because we as a species want to poor a concrete layer over the entire planet, doesnāt mean that we didnāt come from nature. The forests are home. Nature is home.
The lessons to be learned from observing and being in nature, I feel, directly help combat the mental and emotional illnesses that are becoming rampant in the modern, developed, first world countries of the world.
Every day I have a reminder of my phone set to go off that says āI am Aware of Cognitive Distortionsā. It only goes off once per day. I could probably use another two or threeā¦dozen reminders over the course of the day, as could most people.
Cognitive distortions or perceiving reality inaccurately, is as natural and normal and easy and automatic as breathing. Is it possible for people to not interpret and assign meaning to the things that happen to them? Yes. Is that the normal, commonplace way most humans live? No
Framing what happens to us in a positive way is obviously preferable. But if the majority of people had a positive way at looking at the world, the world we live in would be unrecognizable. Weād be closer to the Garden of Eden than not.
Negativity is natural. Itās part of how we have evolved. Itās how we have survived from hunter gatherers to farmers to the industrial revolution to the information age. Unfortunately the information age has put cognitive distortions on steroids. Social media echo chambers, travel vlog FOMO, influencer sensationalization, hustle culture, face filters and photoshop.
All designed to exploit our tendency towards cognitive distortions; to think less of ourselves, more of the content creators, so that we will spend our time, attention, and emotional reactions on whatever theyāre selling.
Being aware of cognitive distortions brings a bit of wisdom to the information age that drowns us collectively and individually. Awareness is the way out after all. No magic pill. Awareness is less than action. But often right action wonāt come unless awareness is there.
Positive, productive, beneficial cognitive distortions are preferred to the negative. It is almost always better to frame what is happening to us in a way that is productive as long as it doesnāt bring harm to anyone else.
Today however, as an exercise in having our feet on the ground while our headsā are in the clouds, lets try to observe the external reality we live in with objectivity first. This is as it is. Acknowledge the is-ness of the moment. Be aware of what is happening without assigning labels. Then take action from there.
This is Eckhart Tolle 101. Practical. Applicable. Real world helpful.
Separated from the spiritual enlightenment and fulfillment practices that Tolle is synonymous with.
Just do it, over and over and over and over and over again.
Does it have to be great every time? NO
Does it have to be good every time? no
Do you still need to do it even when you donāt want to? Yes
That is where the mental disconnect is for myself and the majority of people when it comes to establishing and sticking to new habits. When starting something new, itās rarely if ever going to be good at first.
The not wanting to do something different is baked into the human condition. If starting and sticking to new, hard things was easy we would be living in a utopia.
What I have found in my experience is the lack of motivation gets its fuel from the thought of not wanting to be bad, look bad, come across as bad, etc.
Bad meaning inferior, mediocre, amateur, inadequate.
People donāt like looking foolish. Thatās human nature. One can notice this in the ratio of creators to critics.
One of the things that has helped me is taking enthusiasm and expectation of quality out of the equation. I have so many journal entries that have the line āIām just going through the motionsā written, then list what I did that day, what I ate that day, my current mood, etc. With the end goal being habitual daily journal writing.
Not quality journal writing. Habitual journal writing.
Not quality published essays/articles/blogs (at first). Habitually published essays/articles/blogs.
Itās so natural and so common and so normal to resist doing something because weāll be bad at it at first. I stopped playing video games because my friends all got way better than me and I didnāt want to keep losing to them and didnāt want to invest the time into getting better.
On the other end of the importance spectrum; after finally following my lifeās dream of becoming a professional wrestler, I resisted practicing and taking low level indy bookings because I didnāt want to look foolish or embarrass myself.
Every bar and nightclub in the history of the world has been filled with men and women who donāt talk to each other because theyāre scared of sounding foolish on approach and/or looking foolish if rejected.
So consider taking positive expectations, excitement, and enthusiasm out of the equation and just go through the motions. Literally saying to yourself internally or out load thatās what youāre doing in the process. Or writing it down. Or texting it to yourself. As long as the thing you want to do gets done, today.
Then the next day. Then the next day. Then next week. Then the week after that. Then next month. Then the month after that. Until itās just something you do. Until the thing you want to do is something that you start to do on autopilot. Until you know you are going to do it that day as your default setting when you wake up (and have your morning coffee).
Itās when we reach the point of doing it by default, that we can shift our focus to proficiency, quality, excellence, and hopefully one dayā¦mastery.
Thereās value in just going through the motions.
Anarchy Journal Constitutional 